So I used to be a fundamentalist Christian and loved to tell people they were going to hell.
Tag: Tom Haward
Ted the Twat
Ted went bright red, his nostrils flared and his mouth pursed. His mouth reminded me of a hairy arsehole, all pursed lipped like that and wispy hair around his top lip. I thought about voicing my observation but he was still trying to process the fact I had called him a cunt.
Take Yourself Away
Take yourself away my beautiful one.Take yourself away from the thoughts of disdain,And vanquish the cloudy lack of worth,To see the gorgeous person you have become.Don’t be swept up in the lies of insecurity,Where you’re battered and gasping for air,Worrying if you have any strength or quality,Because I am swept up in who you are. Take…… Continue reading Take Yourself Away
Obnoxious Brits Abroad
I know I would be happy not to serve a half naked, sun burnt British guy who asked for Omelette and chips instead of gorgeous locally produced tapas.
Rural Racists Worried about Immigration
A racist from a small, rural village is fuming about open borders and mass immigration.
Bloody Cotton Buds
Dating is tiring. It’s exciting to meet someone you think is hot as hell and you hope thinks you’re a bit of alright too. But dating is exhausting because it feels a bit like a marketing campaign and you’re the campaign manager whose previous experience involved designing a Clip Art poster on Word.
Tom Haward 